Stress isn’t good for anyone, and like usual for what I talk about, it really isn’t good for people with ADHD. I’ve often spoken about how we have a stronger reaction to both highs and lows, and this is one of the lows I mean. When I’m stressed, most people can tell almost immediately, and the reason for that is it shows on my face. My skin breaks out and goes red, and this can happen from even the most minor of things. Sometimes I really have to step back and realise just how much of my life is affected by ADHD. I never would have thought that being stressed about something could be different for me than it is for everyone else, and yet it is.
There are so many little things which are different. Take time pressure, for example. A normal person might feel a bit rushed before a deadline, but for me, time blindness turns a simple deadline into a countdown that feels like it’s mocking me. I’ll either ignore it completely until the last possible second, or obsess over it so much I can’t focus on anything else. There’s no in-between.
Then there’s the sensory side of it. When I’m stressed, everything feels louder, brighter, more. A notification sound that wouldn’t normally register suddenly feels like it’s drilling into my skull. My skin breaks out, my face goes red, and on top of that, I’m hyper-aware that people can see it happening, which somehow makes it worse.
The hardest part is the aftermath. Once the stress hits, my brain doesn’t just switch off when the problem is solved. I’ll lie awake replaying conversations from three days ago, convinced I said something wrong, even when logically I know I didn’t. That’s the ADHD brain for you, it doesn’t do ‘let it go’ very well.
What I’ve come to realise is that stress for me isn’t just an emotion, it’s a full body experience that other people simply don’t have to deal with in the same way. And once I started accepting that, instead of comparing my reaction to everyone else’s, things got a little easier. Not perfect, but easier. Because at the end of the day, understanding why my brain does what it does is half the battle.
